Now what do you have? What are some of your favourites Jack White?
J: I have a zebra. I have two gazelles. I have a tiger.

A zebra?
J: A zebra head, yeah. I have a kudu and a mountain goat and I have lots of things.

And all these are from thrift shops and stuff?
M: Some of them are old. A lot of them are old.

Does anybody bring any gifts of them to your shows?
J: That'd be nice.

That'd be the ultimate gift for The White Stripes.
J: She's not that into it.
M: It creeps me out a little.

Now on this tour right now you've got Whirlwind Heat.
J: Whirlwind Heat. An amazing band. Come and see them.

Cause they're on your record label right?
J: Could be. Possibly. Yeah.

I think it's really cool that you treat bands quite well. I mean, didn't Whirlwind Heat have to open for you really early once and you felt bad so you let them headline after you.
J: Man, you've done your research. Excellent. Yeah, they came out. After we were done with our set they came out and did another set.

That's so cool that you're able to support them in that way.
M: Yes indeed.

And taking Billy Childish! Is there anybody else in England you can take along with you. I mean, besides from the Detroit bands, anybody you want to throw out on your English tours.
J: Holly Golightly is great. We like to tour with other bands from Detroit. We're all friends and I think there's a lot of good music coming out of Detroit that people haven't heard yet.

Are you the only A&R guy on Virgin records?
J: (laughs) I'm not an A&R guy at all.

I heard they fired their entire staff and you, Jack White, are the only guy doing A&R for Virgin.
J: I haven't heard about that one. Maybe I should do that and give this all up.

You just came played Los Angeles, California. Now my friend Grant from The Smugglers who's house you stayed at a while back once had William Shatner show up at one of his gigs in LA. Like that's dope, eh?
J: That would be dope, yes.

Is there anybody of that ilk that has shown up that you just kinda go "Whoa, like, Shat-Mannn!"
J: Bette Midler came to our show in New York and danced to the whole show. Midler in the balcony. It was pretty cool.

Oh my God! Now how did you notice that? Did you actually see her?
J: No, we were told. I couldn't see anything because of the lights. Because of the way the lights were shining I couldn't see anything up there. But that's what we were told.

That's so awesome because she did 'The Rose' and Mudhoney covered 'The Rose' and Mudhoney got Billy Childish to open for them in England!
J: And Mudhoney was at our show last night!

Whoa-ho! This is amazing! What about Ike Turner, has he ever come to any of your gigs?
M: No, I don't think so.
J: No, Andre Williams has though. We've played with Andre Williams.

From Detroit.
J: That's right.

I think he was on the street for a little while though wasn't he?
J: He was on the street for a long time I think. He was working with Ike Turner a lot.

Now the MTV Movie Awards last night. That was incredible. We saw it last night in Canada. You guys were all dressed up and so was everybody else all dressed up. What was the vibe on that?
M: It was really good because it was all fans. They picked people all out of lines and the our website and everything else so they were all just crazy fans. And it wasn't like models or anything and so it was good.

Were you shown any respect? Like did Eminem ever talk to you or anything?
M: Um, No.

Any shout-outs? Like did anybody go "Heyyy, Jack!" Jack Black did a great intro for you. I loved it. He was, like, standing on a turntable.
J: It was nice yeah.

Did he make that turntable especially for you?
J: Yeah, he did. That was the only time he used that in the show I think. Yeah, they made it for us.

But, like, did anybody else throw out any props to you, like, "How ya doin'!"
J: I don't think so. Oh, Andy Dick said "Hi." He said he really liked the band.

So the true White Stripes fans are revealed by who actually introduces themselves to you right?
M: I suppose so.

Now there's a lot of fans out there of the White Stripes that are on the internet. Are you aware of the Red Blood Cells project?
J: I heard about it.

This is Redd Blood Cells. (Nardwuar shows them print out from http://www.reddkross.com/features/RBC) Now what this is... this is Steven McDonald of Redd Kross and he has decided to do what Jack?
J: I met him the other night and he told me about this. He told me about this and he said that he's adding, he's playing bass along with all of our songs.

Yeah, with Hotel Yorba and some others. You go to reddkross.com to check out some bass on Hotel Yorba. What do you think about that?
J: I think it's a great idea. It's an interesting project.

He was able to fulfill his fantasies of playing with The White Stripes.
J: See the power of technology.

And another thing I was looking at. I was just checking this out. You know, people dressing up as you. I mean there's tribute bands for you guys. There's like Different...
M: Different Stripes.

Now what are Different Stripes like? They're a tribute band to you guys.
J: Supposedly it was some famous person who was doing it under an anonymous thing. He did one for the Strokes and he did one for us.

But you have cooler fans than The Strokes because there's a fan out there that does White Stryper!
J: White Stryper?

That dress as Stryper, the '80s heavy metal band, and do White Stripes songs!
J: Ohhh.

White Stryper! But these guys, what is going on here Jack? This is from the NME (Nardwuar shows a New Musical Express with a picture of some comedians dressed up as the White Stripes)
M: Oh, This is terrible.
J: This is NME's way of getting back at us for not going to their awards show.

Now these are some comedians dressing up as you.
M: Yes.
J: We didn't go to their awards so they decided not to give us our award because we didn't show up. And then they also made fun of us.

So what do you say? At the bottom of the picture they say "It remains to be seen if Jack White will react the same, because Geri Halliwell really loved it." (When the comedians dressed up as her)
J: Geri Halliwell loved it. I don't know what to tell you. I'll think about it.

Now White Stripes, Meg and Jack White of the White...
J: Stripes.

What sort of craziness has gone on? I mean, I heard that you guys were offered a private jet somewhere.
J: (groans)

Is that true? A private jet?
J: A private jet? (laughs)

Yeah, someone said "Come on my private jet?"
J: I don't think so. I don't know about that one.

None of that? Some of the crazy stuff that's been offered. I know you've been offered White Strips. White Strips.
J: Oh, they tried to buy our website. White Strips the---

---White Strips. The tooth cleaning thing. It's like the teeth cleaning thing. You put it on your teeth and then you rip it off.
J: Right.

I wanted to bring that for you but it's $60 Canadian!
M: Wow.

They wanted to buy... they wanted you to endorse White Strips?
J: I think The White Stripes website was too close to their website if you accidentally load it wrong. So they wanted to buy our website. I think that's what I was told.

And you guys said "No!"
M: Of course.
J: (laughs)

So has there been any other craziness going on? C'mon, I'm workin', I'm workin' hard here. C'mon, like, Bette Midler, White Strips, you know, jet rides, Elton John jam? I know Ryan Adams covers your tunes. I mean, like, that's kinda funny. (laughs) ---
J: (laughs)

---But , you know, tell me, any kind of craziness?
M: Constant craziness.
J: Some of the craziness we just can't reveal to you because it's too crazy.

Just a little tidbit, just a little teaser here winding up please Meg and Jack White. Just give me insight into The White Stripes. Like you check your cell phone message or something--
J: One thing I can tell is that ... Meg's an android.
M: Dammit Jack.
J: (laughs) I'm sorry. I thought you knew. If you just knew how at the end of every night we have to plug her into the tour bus, plug her in and change her oil every three months to keep this band going.

Much like Man Or Astro-Man. Where are they from?
J: [silence]

Outerspace! And you are Meg and Jack White of The White Stripes. Jack, you're gear is incredible. I should say it's so awesome that your roadies dress up as you. Like they wear red and white. I love it. Don't they use like red duct tape, too? Like you have red duct tape!
J: (laughs) We have to keep everything in order now. We have to be able to identify everything in my sight you know.

And your Leslie amp. That's really cool isn't it? The Leslie amp.
M: The peppermint triple tremelo.

Yeah, is that going to be onstage here tonight?
J: It's too heavy.
M: It weighs 500 pounds.

Can you explain a bit about that? Cause that's amazing. You customized a Leslie amp.
J: Yeah, I built it. I found three different components in the garbage. I was trash picking and I built 'em all together and made a speaker cabinet out of it. It was just a nice project to work on.

Does anybody else have an Airline guitar? Like you play an Airline right?
J: Well I bought mine from Jack of The Oblivions. Jack Oblivion is his name. He's in a band from Memphis in America.

Any other bands you've seen playing that? Or any bands got mad seeing you playing that? Like some Hollywood Guitar Center dude?
J: No, I never really see anybody else really play those. Once in awhile you'll see somebody with it.

When you guys were on David Letterman I thought it was awesome that Letterman held up the vinyl record.
M: Oh yeah, we specially asked for him to do that, yeah.

Was it hard to get him to do that?
J: It was because it had to be checked for anthrax before he held it, you know.

No way!
J: There's something crazy for ya.

Sympathy For The Record Industry is like that dangerous!?!
J: It had to be tested for anthrax before he would hold it. That's what I was told.

If there's any doubt that the White Stripes have arrived in mainstream culture it's that you guys are now on groupiecentral.com.
J: Really?

Yes, groupiecentral.com has a posting of you guys. Under the subject "White Stripes," and it goes, and I quote here Jack White, "I can say that Jack has and will be down for groupie action. I was so fortunate to experience him during one of their tours. Let's just say it happened by surprise and was well worth it."
J: [laughing]

"He is adequate in size and performance. I think he may like to be ridden, but I requested that he ride me."
J: Hmmm.

And then it goes on to say "Meg's boyfriend is in the Greenhornes."
J: This is all nuts.

You've made it! You're on groupiecentral.com. Don't worry Jack, you can go on groupiecentral.com and post some lies too, just like they did there.
J: Those are pretty good lies.

Groupiecentral.com. Are you dating somebody in the Greenhorns at all Meg?
M: I'm not going to comment on my situation.
J: (laughs)

And you're not dating Winona Ryder are you?
J: (laughs)

That's the other rumour floating around there Jack.
J: We'll see. (laughs)

Well thanks so much for your time. Really appreciate it there White Stripes. Why should people care about the White Stripes. Why should people care?
J: I don't know. (laughs) I don't know why they should care anymore.

Have you ever been to Legoland?
M: No, not yet.

Have you had any offers to go to Legoland?
J: We did have an offer to go there once and uh, we didn't go. I don't know why we didn't go. We didn't have time I don't think.

Jack and Meg White, anything else you'd like to add to the people out there?
M: Mmmm, no.
J: No, I guess not.

Well thanks so much. Keep on rockin' in the free world and doot doola doot doo...
J: Mm-hmm.

Actually, "Mm-hmm" works.
J + M: (laughing)

But that's so like obscure we'll have you do it again there. Doot doola doot doo...
M: Doot doo. No? I don't know. I just...
J: I don't know what you mean. (laughs) That's fine. That'll be fine. That'll be $5 please.